Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
