She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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