I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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