I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
