I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
