I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize