i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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