My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
