i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
