what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I want her autograph on my taint
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
