How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
