She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
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