I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
