so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
