You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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