his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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