Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
