i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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