Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
