He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
