Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
