you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
How does it feel to date your dad?
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
