i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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