So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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