we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
