They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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