if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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