Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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