i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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