did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
