so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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