I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
