Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
is this the sara with the beer cane?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize