At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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