sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
