We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
she looked like the before picture.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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