from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
