OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
