He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
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