Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
