i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
