im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i out mim tonsoeep
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