She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
organizing the empties. That sober.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize