Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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