If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize