On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
