Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
