I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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