i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize