they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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